


A Miqo'te says Goodbye

by MaybeGrimm



Series: Rhela'a One-shots [2]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Break Up, M/M, Post-Break Up, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Indulgent, Self-Reflection, Slice of Life, Ul'dah (Final Fantasy XIV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:01:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27645875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaybeGrimm/pseuds/MaybeGrimm
Summary: Rhela'a has known true love and lost it. This is the short story of the goodbye.
Relationships: Original Character(s)/Original Character(s), Original Male Character/Original Male Character, Original Male Character/Original Male Character (Implied)
Series: Rhela'a One-shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1682101





	A Miqo'te says Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: to be honest, the fanfic is full of self-indulgence, and maybe angst in general a little exaggerated.

As he packed his few posessions, Rhela’a barely felt like that was happening. For a second, for the most brief and beautiful of moments, he believed that place was going to be his home. But it was more than the place itself, of course. It was all about the owner, about his caring hands assuring him he would never be alone again, that he mattered.

He smiled at his own stupidity. One could believe he was big enough to stop believing people’s lies, but as reluctant as he was in general, a part of him wanted badly to believe in something like that.

“Thank you, I love you…”, he whispered to the little necklace that was in his hands, kissing it softly before leaving it on the pillow of the bed that was theirs.

The sun in the center didn’t answer to his confession, but it didn’t have to. Rhela’a just needed to express it one more time, one _last_ time before going away, leaving his broken heart behind him. Hopefully, leaving it behind was going to avoid him more suffering in the future. He would never have to stubbornly search for true love again, because he knew exactly where he was, even if it was lost forever.

He sighed, closing his eyes to hold back the tears that were fighting to be free. He didn’t want to give them that pleasure, and he knew deeply that if he allowed one to come out, the others would quickly knock him down. And then, all that person was going to remember from him was going to be a crying mess being pulled out the building.

Another sigh. This time, his lips trembled a little when they pull out the air.

“Stop it.” He said to himself, and he opened his eyes to look at the room just one last moment. The silked sheets they happily messed up, the curtains they always forgot to close, the lights they wanted to turn off and the ones that allowed them to see each other in the dark.

He fell to the floor. For a moment, it was too much to process, too much to burn in his mind forever, too much to handle. The tears came out before he managed to stop them, but he forced his lips to close so his cry could go unheard. His sharp nails, once used to love and play, were now hurting his own skin, and he barely noticed when was the moment he started to hug himself.

He looked down to try to stop the tears, hugging the bag in his hands, and when he looked up to search for a place to lean, he saw a thing hiding under the bed. Rhela’a cleaned his teary eyes with the back of his hand before crawling to pick up whatever that was, with his ears lifted and his tail curious.

Recognizing the thing almost made him cry.

But, instead, for some weird and funny trick of his mind, he smiled widely.

For a moment, it didn’t mattered that he was being kicked out that place, or that he was feeling like his life was ending. He took the notebook from the floor and caressed the cover softly, as if he was touching it for the first time.

Rhela’a remembered the first time he touched it, of course. He gave it to him in that same room in order to take notes in some important reunion he was going to have. Rhela’a remembered how much he was trembling when he made the doodles that were in the first page. He also remembered how full he was feeling, as the night before that he was an horrible mess full of heat scent and hormones, and the next morning everything was sort of a heaven of careful caresses and messy kisses.

He smiled even more, letting the bag at one side and hugging the notebook tighly. He let his tears free once more, and chuckled in his cry, feeling grateful with fate for giving him that last gift.

He opened the notebook again, but from the other side that time. In the last page, there was a sneaky heart in one corner, and a big, very carefully draw “B” in the center of the page. A sentence bad written was under the letter, little and messy: “fav orit leter”. Rhela’a cringed over his own ignorance, but also found that simple expression a pretty demostration of love.

Wondering if the drawing was still there, he moved trough the pages and pages of failed sentences until he found it. Big, taking the space of two pages, there was the sketch for some house interiors, with some notes made in his own messy writting, and some others in the more pleasant-to-see writing of the other man. Rhela’a ran one finger trough those letters, carefully and lovingly as he was caressing the hands that wrote them.

“Kichenn”, “Garden”, “Books”, all notes in Rhela’a’s writing, with some corrections here and there. “Our Bedroom” stood out among all those words without much grace, not so much for the beauty of the calligraphy but for the almost childish ornaments that accompanied "Our."

He could happily sink in that notebook, and he could bet that around those last pages was a prominent list of names for babies that tried —and failed— to be a good mix between the au ra and the miqo’te traditions. He was going to get drunk that night reading that notebook, going trough the pages, and hopefully falling asleep with it in his hands.

Hopefully he would die with it in his hands one day.

A sudden question appeared in his mind, and the possible answer filled his heart with hope. There was a heaven? If he was a good person at the end, and he didn’t just heard the noise in his mind telling him that nothing was worth anymore, maybe…

“Have you ended packaging?” A voice was heard from the door, and Rhela’a didn’t even had to turn back to know who it was.

“Yes.” He said quietly, standing up and holding the bag again. The notebook was in the other hand, and he showed it to the man standing in from of him, the exact moment he turned to look at him. “I was wondering if I could take this with me.”

The au ra didn’t seem to be like him at all. Actually, he seemed kind of relieved. Rhela’a was thankful it was that way, even if his heart broke a little more because of that.

“I guess you can”, said the man while giving him the notebook back, being careful to not touch his hand in the process.

Rhela’a saved it in his bag as he nodded in silent gratitude. He didn’t wait for more to walk trough the door, and hugged the bag without any fear of being ashamed. It didn’t matter anymore, everything that mattered was already gone.

* * *

A blank space filled Rhela’a’s memories as he moved outside the building. He remembered the faces that once were happy to say him good morning looking at him with contempt, but not much more. He tried very hard to not look at the man when he left, and actually tried to forget every memory he had from the previous night too. Pulling out the notebook from hid bag, he caressed the drafts softly, as it helped him somehow to bring back to his mind another type of memories.

“Rhela’a!” screamed his cousin from the other side of the street. Before that, the miqo’te barely noticed it was really dark outside, and that the last rays of sunshine were shinning in the sky.

«Sunshine…»

“Please, stop…” he whispered, holding the notebook tight, trying to shut up the memories in his mind, eager to came out and make him faint.

“Hey”, said the deep voice of Navhe’ra, placing a hand in his shoulder and looking at him with understanding eyes.

Rhela’a fixed his gaze in his cousin’s, and they both knew how the other was feeling. There were no words needed, and Navhe’ra just stood ahead and hugged him. Rhela’a tried to hold back the tears, once more, but it was useless this time more than ever. He hold Nav’s body along with the little notebook, as if those things were the only things that could keep him standing.

“We will carry on, won’t we? We always do…” Rhakna whispered behind them, taking both back to reality.

Navhe’ra separated from his cousin, and gave a tired smile to him. Rhela’a understood him completely.

Neither of them was going to be fine after that. Not after meeting true love and loosing it. Both of them knew it, and at least they were together at that feeling. But Rhakna still didn’t know that, and hopefully she never would. She deserved some hope, and above all she deserved a happy ending.

Both of them turned back to met her, and the three of them, ChocoNav at hand, headed to the cursed doors of the city, decided to never came back.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, a new little self-indulgent oneshot I wanted to upload about my Catboy and the ending of one of his relationships. I was careful to not use much other people's OCs, hope I did it well. Even months later after the last one-shot, I'm still new in the fandom so, again- sorry for the possible lore mistakes (and the grammar ones, since English isn't my first language). I'd love to know, so please tell me if you find any.


End file.
